So…does anyone like to read happy posts? Sometimes I wonder if posts about things going well and the adventures that go with it are not as interesting or read as much as the posts about the struggles of transition. In my case, transition has been pretty straight forward so far, almost like a non-event. That makes me wonder if I have much to offer the trans community in my posts. I’d actually rather talk about the fun we have with our hobbies than to talk about going to the bank as Amber and being treated like any other customer, what’s so interesting about that? Nobody ever shows up with torches and pitchforks, it’s a non event, even going to Home Depot as Amber and dealing with a cashier that has known the old guy for 15 years was a non-event, no reaction at all, just normal customer service. Nothing to see here folks, just life happening. Does anybody really want to hear about stuff like that?
Filed under: Life Experiences, Transgender | Tagged: community, happiness, optimism, transition, transitioning |
TRANScend GENDER 
Yes. We do.
What’s wrong with hobbies? Nothing really. I see all the posts about the newly transitioned and the following post is normally what’s next? I went through it 4 years ago and what’s next will continue. I even started a yahoo group about it. The thing was everyone was too busy living life to post anything. I think this is a good thing.
I have a friend that is 25 years since transition. I met her as a new hire at work. How cool is that. I think it is perfectly valid it blog about life. I think we owe it to others following in our path our experience, strength and hope. We live by example, to have transition, as a non-event is a good thing. My friend that transitioned 25 years ago has told me the horror stories surrounding her transition. It was a different time and the path was less traveled.
Congratulations to you Nikki and to us all. You have completed one of the hardest things you will ever do in life. I found it gave me courage to try other things I could not attempt before.
It is still a precarious time and the political climate is not assured for us. If you can be active and are in a place to help things by all means do so. Volunteer, get political, be an active face. We all need to give back.
Bring on the happy posts!
Love,
April
I think the non-events are the most intriguing, but I see how the angst-ridden posts get the most response due to a desire to support someone going through hard times. You and I front-loaded our difficulties and are now in a pretty mellow stage of transition so people’s response time is given to those who may need encouragement to help them through.
Good point, Teresa. The number of comments is not always related to how much people appreciated a post. People are much more likely to type out a response to someone in pain than they are to add a quick “Yay, go you!” It doesn’t mean they’re not thinking it. 🙂
I agree. In some ways it makes transition seem like a process of getting past all the bad, when, in fact, there are many joys and good times along the way. In my blog, I think that I have tried to take more of a middle road, reflecting on some of aspects of transition, not as negatives, but trying to put them in context of my transition and my thoughts on transition. I must admit, that at times I feel reluctant to share some of my joys, worried that because I have not experienced many down times and have had a relatively smooth transition thus far that others will think I am gloating or something. In reality, I am holding in some of the first joys that I have been able to truly experience and enjoy with my whole being. The normal days and successes of transition are so much more enjoyable and real then even some of the best times in my “male” life. I wish we could all share more of our daily joys with each other.
Kathryn
funny stories are good, the best of intentions going awry, humans is humans, yanno?
I think it’s important to tell the good stories, the stories of just being accepted. It’s important for young people who are questioning to hear them. I started going out dressed about 5 years ago, at age 30, and was surprised to have the same good experiences, non-events really. Now I get out crossdressed about twice a month, not only shopping, but to a variety of events like crafting classes, discussion groups, lectures, and lobbying state legislators. It is the most perfectly natural thing, and that’s the most surprising thing.
The problem, my second child was born when I was 29. My wife is really having a hard time accepting this, but we will remain married for the kids. We are a close family and truly believe we can be better parents together than separate. So I get out twice a month, knowing I should transition.
My hope is that young people who are questioning will read about how life can be normal for someone who is transgender. I hope they read about the good times and decide figure out who they are before marrraige and kids.