“Pregnant Man” – Who Should Care?

Note: this blog was in part inspired by Helen G’s blog Pregnant man is pregnant which I did reply to. I did use that reply as a basis for this post. But as usual I had more to say. 🙂

I watched the 20/20 episode on Thomas Beatie tonight (thank goodness for DVR) and I have to comment on some of the things that were discussed. First off, I’m glad that the baby does have parents that love and care for this child. I am disturbed by the lack of caring and hatred shown in some of the messages sent to Thomas and his family, wishing death to him and his family. HOW DARE THEY? Why do people insist on judging what they themselves do not understand? At least do your research before you dare to put any judgment on ANYONE.

TO THE ASSHOLE (please excuse my language) who said that God does not make mistakes. Did this asshole ever think that Thomas was put on this earth with the condition that he has, for a purpose? Maybe it was to show the world how diverse the universe really is. There are people born every day with conditions like missing fingers, arms, legs, born with genetic conditions like cleft lips or Down’s Syndrome for example. The list goes on and on. Just because someone is born transgender does not make them any different than anyone else. And it sure as heck does not make them any less human. And until recently (last 20 or so years), people who are transgender had no other options to treat their condition. We have a viable treatment now, so back off. We have the right to treat this condition and we will.

Sorry I got carried away, but all this gets to me at times. I’m pre-op and want to be able to provide for my family and continue to teach my kids what values and dignity really mean. And they will surely not be taught bigotry and hate. I’ve always taught my kids to respect others and treat them as they would want to be treated. I was not allowed to tell my kids until they each were around 15 that I was trans, but it didn’t make a difference. They love and respect me for who I am, not based on appearances, clothes or anything else. And yes, I have their support for my transition. I am so proud of them.

People should be ashamed of themselves to even think about taking Nancy’s parental rights away. They both seem to be a very loving couple and I’LL BET that their child will grow up to be a much better HUMAN than the bigots that have sent them hate mail or messages. If there is a case to take away parental rights, I’d say first look at the bigots out there. After all they are a much BIGGER threat to society than the Beaties. Ok, Nancy had issues conceiving a child and Thomas just happened to still have the right plumbing to conceive a child, so what. They both are the parents and the way I see it, they are doing their best to provide and take care of that child (ok, soon to be children). And another thing, what the heck is this Parent/Parent crap on the birth certificate of their child? Thomas is legally male and Nancy is legally female. What the heck is the issue, WAKE UP OHIO. Gee whiz!!!  [Editor’s Note:  Thomas and Nancy Beatie actually live in Oregon.]

I see changes in attitudes everyday and that gives me hope for a brighter future for everyone. But the fact remains that there is a lot of work that still needs to be done to educate people on transgender issues. Sure, in the Beatie’s case, it brings up many issues that not as many people think about on a daily basis, but who’s to say that what they are going through right now, with having a child, will not be an issue with you or I later on down the road of our journey. I think everyone just needs to back off and let them take care of their new family. YES I SAID IT. FAMILY!!! So for me, they have my support and they will always have my support. I hope this family remains blessed and has a great future.

God Bless the Beaties.

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6 Responses

  1. “TO THE ASSHOLE (please excuse my language) who said that God does not make mistakes. Did this asshole ever think that Thomas was put on this earth with the condition that he has, for a purpose?”

    I always want to turn to people like that and ask: So God put you on this earth with a specific purpose and path in mind? Don’t you think He had a specific purpose and goal for me? How do you know that this isn’t my goal? How DARE YOU challenge God and what He has determined for me!

    “And another thing, what the heck is this Parent/Parent crap on the birth certificate of their child? Thomas is legally male and Nancy is legally female. What the heck is the issue, WAKE UP OHIO. Gee whiz!!!”

    Hrmm.. I thought Thomas Beattie lived in Oregon? Their rules for identifying parents and such may be different than other states (I know some require all surgeries before “blessing” gender down — dumb I know but there you have it). Although, when you think about it remove the gender portion from ALL birth certificates and problem is solved in regards to same-sex or gender different parents. (level playing field?)

  2. Ohh, Sorry about that Ohio. If the gender portion of the birth certificate is removed for EVERYONE, then at least we would be on a level playing field. Unfortunately, this is not what they are doing. Its just sad that the trans community is discriminated against everyday, and we have politicians in this country that don’t even care. Hopefully in our lifetime, we will see equal rights for EVERYONE and not just a select few. Thanks Syrlinus for your reply.
    Hugs Michelle

  3. God help us all if we think that a man can have a baby. He appeared to be a man on the outside but is full woman in the inside. Still a woman. Dress it up if you please, still a woman.

  4. We are not defined by our genitals. A person can be a woman without a uterus or ovaries, and someone can be a man without a penis or testicles. Sometimes these things happen due to genetics, sometimes due to accidents, sometimes due to disease. The people involved are no less men or women as a result of such happenstances, however.

    Life is never as simple and straightforward as we hope. Certainly, Thomas Beatie’s pregnancy challenges many of our beliefs and understandings about the nature of gender and sex, but the world, and our understanding of it, are changing. Whether or not we understand or agree with them, tolerance for those different than us is essential to peace in this world.

  5. Thank you Abby, I totally agree.
    Hugs Michelle

  6. “God help us all if we think that a man can have a baby. He appeared to be a man on the outside but is full woman in the inside. Still a woman. Dress it up if you please, still a woman.”

    What exactly do you mean “full woman”? That would suggest that he identifies as being a woman and he doesn’t. Or are you suggesting that we are entirely defined by our genitals and nothing more? If Beattie had full surgeries (full bottom surgery would run around $35-100K out of his pocket and I know few FTMs that have benefits that cover it, let alone pocket change to cover it).

    Interestingly enough, by your comment, you seem to think he’s a guy since you use the appropriate pronoun.

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